There are two versions of the creation of "Stand by His Majesty"; the official version, and the
mundane version. What happened later, though, is actually true, and led to Eldwin Nightowl
being nicknamed "the nearly beheaded."
As no one will admit to being Sister Hooter
who wrote the lyrics above, they are released
into the public domain. The wallpaper was
created by The Loveshade Family, and is also
released into the public domain.
|(Sung to the tune of "God Bless America"* by Irving Berlin)
Stand by his Majesty,
King of Caid,
Stand beside him, and guide Him
Especially when he's had too much mead.
Or too much liqueur, too much mulled wine,
Too much dark beer topped with foam.
Stand by his Majesty, wherever he may roam.
Stand by his Majesty, and make sure he gets home.
|Stand by His Majesty
by Sister Hooter
In this version, Eldwin Nightowl and Brianna Sparrowhawk were on their way to the
coronation of Guy of Castle Kirk and Darla of Castle Kirk on the 19th of November A.S. XXIII
(A.D. 1989). While traveling, they passed an evil, foul, shrunken dwarf who was beginning
to sing a song. While Brianna wisely moved on, Eldwin stayed to listen.
But soon he realized that he was unnaturally enthralled by the song, written by one known
as Sister Hooter, through some foul enchantment. As soon as the song ended, he slew the
evil dwarf. But then, at the dwarf's death, he knew he had inherited its curse, and would be
forced to sing the scandalous song until the day he sang it for his Majesty, at which point the
curse would be removed.
In this version, Eldwin Nightowl and Brianna Sparrowhawk were getting ready to go to the
Society for Creative Anachronism (SCA) coronation of Guy of Castle Kirk and Darla of
Castle Kirk on the 19th of November A.S. XXIII (A.D. 1989). They talked while getting ready
and on the way to the coronation, and came up with a humorous song about the incoming
King of Caid.
But as they were loyalists, they would not sing such a song unless they had some sort of an
excuse for doing so. Not wanting to admit they wrote it, they blamed a semi-fictional
character named Sister Hooter, whose name was inspired by another SCA miscreant and
semi-fictional character named Brother Goose.
|What really happened later
I, Eldwin, sang the song a time or two to SCAers in private. Then, one evening at an SCA
war, I thought this is it. I approached King Guy of Castle Kirk. There were a few people
around, not many, but his sword bearer was there. I told King Guy the story of the dwarf,
and that I had been cursed to sing a horrible song about the King of Caid, and the curse
would not be lifted until I sang it for his Majesty. I then kneeled before him, and pleaded with
him to behead me so I would not have to sing the song.
I did not know what King Guy would do, but what he did shocked me. As I was kneeling with
my head on the ground, he bellowed in a powerful, majestic voice, "Bring me my sword!" His
retainer brought him his sword, not one of those rattan swords that SCA fighters use in mock
combat, and not one of those pot metal souvenirs you hang over your fireplace, but a real
sword with a real, deadly blade. Through the corner of my eye, I saw his Majesty lift the
sword into the air over my head.
For a moment, it was all too real. King Guy was so convincing, I actually thought, "He's not
really going to cut my head off, is he?" I quickly thought of course he wouldn't, but the
moment of horror was there.
Then King Guy brought his sword down, and it actually touched my neck. I was, thankfully,
unharmed. Then he lifted his sword off my neck, and returned it to its sheath or possibly
gave it to his retainer. Then he commanded in the voice of the king, "Sing the song!" So I
stood and sang the song below.
Afterward, he said there wasn't anything wrong with the song, but that it showed concern for
his Majesty. It was one of those rare moments in the SCA where "the dream" became very,
|The song "God Bless America" typically is sung with repeats, with the second and/or third
version slightly longer and with a more dramatic ending (it typically repeats the last line). The
song above does not repeat, but uses the tune of the more dramatic version. Occasionally, the
song is sung with "God Bless His Majesty" as the first line.
|This is perhaps the first piece
credited to Sister Hooter. She
wrote a number of satiric
pieces, and was a contributor
to Gallavally and Dreiburgen
publications that happened to
come out around April Fools
Day. Some believe "Sister
Hooter" is actually a
pseudonym that's been used
by more than one person.
Currently, Sister Hooter is
recognized as a co-founder of
the Shamlicht Kids Club.